Fri Mar 28 03:25:43 2025

I am small but I am important, obscure yet persistent, damned but oh so very very dedicated. And so I ask you sincerely. So very sincerely. Who the hell are you and where am I?

i'm heav; there's a page here about that. you're on my website. or i guess you were, at least.

Thu Mar 27 03:40:57 2025

what if I aggressively scrapped your site, ignoring robots.txt?

considering that you host my site, i'd rather you not scrap it. i worked hard on it. i don't know what kind of robots.txt directive can prevent this.

Mon Mar 17 18:11:32 2025

what's your opinion on emordnilaps?

they're okay. that is... not one of them.

Fri Feb 14 14:42:14 2025

Bull can rage?

i hear they're capable of it.

Fri Feb 14 02:36:03 2025

whats your favrite sustaining consumable item?

this depends on what implication 'item' has. assuming this can be a generality, i suppose water is pretty good. it has lots of cool properties, a convenient phase transition, and one can consume it.

Thu Feb 13 01:06:08 2025

Are you a human being? If so, would you defy your humanity to become something other? If you are not, why do you find yourself on human infrastructure? Are you aware of infohazards? Are you aware of Direct Infohazards? If not, Roko's Basilisk. If so, Roko's Basilisk. Have you answered yes to any of the above questions? If not, why not? If so, how come? Would you be a good fit as an astronaut or chef? If so, add one to your karma score. Do you believe in a single god or multiple? Are you a person? Do you believe in autonomy. Do you have free will? If so, answer 'duck' to this singular question. If not, please produce a 2-sentence horror story. If answered yes to the first question, consider why. Once you have considered, drink some water. You're dehydrated.

in order: yes, yes assuming there aren't bounds on what you mean by other, i'm aware of infohazards, i'm not sure exactly what you mean, i do know of roko's basilisk, yes i have, because you asked them and that's the point of this page largely, i wouldn't due to my physical unfitness and lack of cooking experience respectively, that's a false dichotomy, yes, yes, i find the whole 'free will' thing to be lacking in meaning or insight and to be awfully trite so i refuse an answer; the remainder of this isn't questions. i hope that answers all remaining questions on anything ever in your life.

Sun Feb 9 14:48:12 2025

do you order things alphabetically? if not, what is your preferred method?

firstly, there are several 'alphabetical orders' depending on how you handle symbols and lengths. second of all, this needs context to be answered properly.

Sun Feb 2 19:57:23 2025

why did you do that? follow up question, can you explain how you did that

i did that because you deserved it. i was able to because you deserved it.

Fri Oct 11 12:38:21 2024

Is there a God? If not, why not?

yes. yes there absolutely is. believe in it unwaveringly and don't listen to anyone who says otherwise. reject any and all arguments to the contrary.

Fri Oct 4 23:13:23 2024

Is there a God? If so how likely do you think they'd be made of spaghetti?

this is unfalsifiable, and to unfalsifiable things i say 'no'. and, you can't apply probabilities to unfalsifiable things. if you do, you get silly things like pascal's wager/mugging.

Fri Sep 27 20:13:28 2024

help me

this is unlikely to happen, given that i don't know who you are.

Fri Aug 30 22:15:41 2024

I don't mean to be insulting, but if you are heav, who are surg and swa?

i'm not sure what this means.

Wed Aug 14 11:49:11 2024

do you own a Wii U

no.

Wed Aug 14 09:57:26 2024

any good music or songs

i think such things exist, somewhere, in some distant land.

Wed Aug 14 09:52:06 2024

Favourite mode of transport

i enjoy the premise of rockets or spaceships. you'd get to do cool things like gravitational slingshots and having inertia.

Wed Aug 14 09:49:04 2024

how are you receiving this question

currently it's all going into this one text file i have to ssh into a server to look at.

do you like milk

sure. i'm lactose intolerant to an extent, though.

what operating system is installed in your computer

arch linux.

what operating system is installed in your brain

that's not a meaningful notion.

Wed Aug 14 09:48:47 2024

do any questions burn in the forefront of YOUR cognition?

plenty. but none that you could answer, i'd imagine.

Wed Aug 14 09:47:57 2024

do you wear glasses

no, i'm NORMAL.

Wed Aug 14 09:47:17 2024

What is your wpm.

around 130 WPM in the best case(source: monkeytype).

Wed Aug 14 09:45:49 2024

what would you do if you were bee

i don't think there would be a meaningful sense in which i'd be me anymore.

Wed Aug 14 09:44:31 2024

is there any interesting object in your vicinity which you might discuss

there's a computer in my vicinity. i think computers are very interesting. they're made of an incredible amount of precision, with components existing on an incredibly small scale.

ed Aug 14 09:42:12 2024

Are you "heav"y?

more so than most subatomic particles.

Wed Aug 14 09:41:01 2024

what are some good non-programming languages ?

none, i hate all of them. every single one.

Wed Aug 14 09:40:50 2024

what are some good programming languages ?

i'm quite partial to lua, which you might expect given how this website is entirely rendered using lua. if you're looking to extend its IO a bit i suggest looking into either the love2d framework, or cqueues and lua-http. computercraft and opencomputers are cool if you're specifically in minecraft and want to program something in lua.

Wed Aug 14 09:39:54 2024

Was this possibly inspired by mondecitronne question page?

i wonder who this 'mondecitronne' character is. i've never seen anything like that around here.

Wed Aug 14 09:39:19 2024

how is your day

i just got up. as with most moments after i get up i felt bleary and lethargic. i walked over to my computer and turned it on. initially the screen was dark with the terminal but i was met with the blinding light of gajim and xterm's light theme upon starting my applications. then i answered some questions like this one.

Wed Aug 14 09:23:40 2024

why is the Collatz Theorem true?

i've never heard of this 'collatz theorem'. do you mean the collatz conjecture?

Wed Aug 14 08:06:07 2024

Why did you create a questions page?

to copy citrons, who was probably copying bill wurtz.

Wed Aug 14 03:57:40 2024

Thoughts on glasses and recent increases in "nearsightedness"? In my day, nobody talked about either of these things.

all these vision-confused kids keep thinking they're "nearsighted" just because everyone tells them they are. we really shouldn't be giving glasses to children, they're too young to make that decision and everyone knows glasses stick to your face permanently with superglue.

Wed Aug 14 03:55:04 2024

do any nonexistent people deserve rights?

literally none of them do.

Wed Aug 14 03:52:51 2024

would you ever have a website?

what a dreadful thing that would be. what a terrible, irredeemable monster i would be to even consider the possibility.

Wed Aug 14 03:52:25 2024

could I stand to be more wordy?

going off of the information i have (i.e that you're aware of the error message), yes.

Wed Aug 14 03:51:39 2024

should I suffer for all eternity?

you shouldn't.